sucked up life

oh hi,well i juz wanna express myself today,for the last few days of how i have been thinking and so on...well,everyday when i awake in the morning this word(what u gonna accomplishes today) always pop up in my head and make me think and stare at the ceiling for a moment and make my think hard...after the whole days pass by and ppl around kicked me hard at my ass and left me nothing...i will start to think all kind of nonsense and stuff and what i did today or even having love sick again...when i am young i always wonder why grow up always have alot of trouble and stuff to do and now i realise being a grow up is not so fun and yes there will be a long and hard journey to walk on till we grow old and rag till die....

and i dare to say what i am thinking recently is kinda really serious and got to do with my life...i always wonder and make conclusion on my own and judge myself and think hard to fix my suck up life and change it for a better future but there nothing i can do about it as i am only 18 this year even i might have the freedom and space of my own doesn't mean i can change it as my parent make the final call...even sometime this kinda issue make my brain crack and stay active when i am asleep physically and sometime it make me go crazy...but i know i cant resolve it...beside that load of work and trouble from office really gonna kill me soon cause i can bear the problem and catch up much with senior...beside that i'm too in a damn serious shit of desperation for girlfriend cause life without partner is kinda suck...why am i saying this...well as a teenager we have alot of peer pressure and secret in life and sometime this little dirty secret is hard to share among friend and family and we really wan to keep this secret in between whom we really can trust...


and why i say my life is suck up...well the fact is kind funny as u continue to read...well being a growing teenager into a young adult and working as a part-timer and doing my own stuff in my little small world is kinda bored...thinking honestly i badly wan to have a girlfriend right by me,REASON!!!

1)everyday having my own lunch alone IS DULL AND BORED
2)having my drink in a cafe alone IS SUCK when there is no special someone to chat to
3)run into my friend and their partner IS TOTAL SUCK when i am alone
4)go out alone nor watch movie alone really make ME BORED AND PAIN IN THE ASS
5)when needed someone to talk to and no one to turn to is BORING

CONCLUSION
MY LIFE IS SUCK AND BORED,MEANINGLESS AND LONELY


and i do have more reason but i juz dunno how to write it down as it may sound the same with different meaning...as we know one picture can have alot of meaning at the background therefore i dun wanna elaborate anymore

and at 3plus today i do have a really bad messenger conversation and pls dun and as it always have been,thing never turn out well and despite the surrounding i now in a deep shit of guiltiness...nothing to talk about it as it is personal and confidential...